Christmas DIY Disaster

Welcome back! I see you are curious to see how the snow globes project went.

  • Snow globes: F-. What the fuck?

But really, make snow globes? Where would I get such a preposterous idea?

Pinterest + Martha Stewart. (The most lethal combination, I assure you.)

Occasionally I like to cruise around on Pinterest. It’s kind of rabbit/K-hole for DIY folks. And it’s easy to see something and say to yourself, “Oh, I could do that!”

This was one of those such times.

Then add a dash of Martha Stewart.

Outcome? DISASTER!

Hindsight is always 20/20. Looking back, I should have known. The Martha Stewart website should have been my first clue. MarthaStewart. This woman can make something from nothing and make it look as easy as — I don’t know — smiling or brushing your teeth. Or breathing. And, in Martha fashion, she made making snow globes look easy. No, no. Not making snow globes — creating winter wonderland in a jar.

Doesn’t that sound magical? (And how was that not a second red flag?)

I mean, listen to this shit:

The shimmering magic of snowfall is always transfixing, whether it’s outside your window or inside this classic toy. Homemade globes let you create a wintry scene straight out of your own imagination.

(How was that not a third red flag?)

Like a big, bug-eyed sucker, I fell for it. I was at Home DepotBeverley’s, and Cost Plus before I knew it.

I’m not quite sure what my first mistake was — I’m going to guess somewhere around starting this project — but there were many mishaps along the way. The first I can remember was purchasing the wrong kind of paint. I bought oil-based paint, not oil-based enamel paint. Since I’m no connoisseur of paint, I don’t know exactly what the difference is but I do know that they are not the same. But, Martha failed to mention that oil-based paints take a very long time to dry. A very, very long time. She also failed to mention that painting lids of any kind is a pain in the ass — logistically speaking.

In an effort to dry the paint before the world ended, I went out and bought shellac. I put several coats on all sides of each of two lids I painted. And it kind of worked. But since the painting didn’t work out so well, I decided to forego painting the third lid altogether.

I found a small thing of epoxy at Home Depot. But if you’ve ever been to the Home Depot epoxy section, and you’re not an expert, choosing the right one is a crap shoot. I asked one of the employees which one would be the best for my project but he didn’t even let me get to the part about the epoxy being submersed in water. He showed me where they were and I just started reading the labels. I ended up choosing a marine epoxy — the figurines and epoxy were going to be in water all the time so it made the most sense — and left unsure. I didn’t choose a clear-drying epoxy because I thought a white/off-white would make it look more festive. This could be another place where I went astray. But, I’ll never know because I’m never trying this again. Ever.

Epoxy is a mess. Make sure you have the surface that you’re working on totally covered with newspaper. Luckily, I did. The epoxy is stringy and gets everywhere. And sticks — like it’s supposed to. Trying to mix the epoxy was a bit difficult but I thought I managed okay until the next day when I went to put the snow globes together and the epoxy was still a bit wet. Even though the box said the set up time was 24 hours, I think 48 hours would have been a much better bet. But again, hard to know since I won’t be doing this again. Ever. Did I mention that already?

It was hard to know how much glitter and glycerin to use because Martha says you need only “a pinch” and “a dash.” Really?

And some of the lids wouldn’t close all the way and water started to leak out.

I have to mention that this project took me about two weeks from start to finish. I started with painting the lids and trying to get them to dry … and hope. And finished with a complete mess and a bit on the verge of my own sanity.

But most of all, I was just disappointed.

I wanted to make something fun and personal for my nephews — something they would enjoy and think of us when they saw.

Instead, I scrapped the project altogether.

I really hope they liked the cookies!

<Thanks to pixabay for making the image available for reuse.>

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